The Greg Dowden Affair

I've been through many strange incidents, some of which make me feel as though a cosmic power delights in playing absurd pranks while I writhe. The following story contains the most bizarre moment of my young life, stemming from a few odd coincidences which aligned and culminated at my friend Brandon's house in late 2000.

We were in the middle of our senior year, enjoying Christmas break by playing Mario tennis at his house. An old friend of ours named Craig Bowden, who'd moved to Indianapolis sometime in middle school, had returned for a visit and was staying with Brandon. While they played, I thumbed through his yearbook, which for whatever reason he'd brought along. It was your typical layout, with horizontal rows of 5 black-and-white portrait photos. The names were on a sidebar at the edge of the page. I thumbed through, idly looking for attractive girls, when I came across someone whose resemblance to Craig was so uncanny that it blew my mind. I showed Brandon, who turned from the match long enough to remark on the similarity. Capitalizing on my ability to make horrible jokes, I said "what's his name, Greg Dowden?" Craig Bowden himself made no comment, apparently unamused by my rhyming jab.

Then I looked to the side of the page, and this is where the story gets fucking strange. The kid's name, no shit, was Greg Dowden.

Digest that, if you will. Not only did Craig Bowden have an unbelievably accurate look-alike in his same school, which is slightly odd but not overly remarkable. Not only did this person have both a first and last name which rhymed with his double, which is pretty amazingly odd and hilarious.

Nope, I'd actually nailed the dude's name with an accidental, obnoxious joke. Craig hadn't reacted because he assumed I knew. I hadn't.

When Brandon saw the name, he started laughing hysterically. I just leaned back against the couch and stared out the window, fully expecting the world I knew to crumble like a curtain, revealing a massive laboratory with giant giggling scientists.





DUSTIN HAS A BLOG:

http://magomra.blogspot.com

In his latest entry, he talked about television or something. Each time I update, I will update you on Dustin's blog progress, even if he has not updated himself. Such is my commitment. Dustin is a big tough person from my high school. One day, I will post a youtube clip of him scoring a touch down.

Today's Dustin fact: He has a friend named Alex who I call "The Sun King."